3.21.15 - Spiritual Colorblindness

What if I told you there was a whole world of "color" out there that you weren't able to see? Well, naturally, being a part of our "I'll believe it when I see it." culture, you likely wouldn't believe me.

What if I told you that "color" and "colorblindness" were mere metaphors and symbols for an entire realm of perception just beyond your grasp?

Would you believe me?

Would you trust me?

How could you know if there were no linguistic way to communicate it to you and no possible way of direct perception?

I ask you to put on these "Special Glasses" and to learn to see the world the way that I do. Connected. One. More uniting us than dividing us. Where the majority typically perceive separateness and division, I only see unity. Moreover, I have no clue how this is not 1) painfully blatantly obvious to everyone else and 2) I have no clue how to effectively transmit my perception to those not already in possession of it.

It's going to take a leap of faith.

You're just going to have to believe...

Maybe one day, you will see...

Until then, you're just going to have to take my word for it.

Tjúguskegg

3.17
"The innocent side of love is captivating to you these days. Although you are ready to reduce the complexity of your life, downsizing is more challenging than it sounds. Nevertheless, walking away from a stressful situation might be part of the larger plan. But this is not the time for a Houdini-like disappearing act; instead, you are learning the subtleties of patience. Romance need not be a house of cards held up by fantasy; a down-to-earth approach to love is more likely to result in a happy heart."

3.19
"Your life seems to be working out just as it should now, but for some unknown reason you still secretly wonder if everything is going to be okay in the long run. This odd juxtaposition tells a story of what can happen if you hide your feelings from those you love. Even if you have a clear view of your path ahead, sometimes it's hard to know the best way to reach your destination. Don't let go of your vision of the future. Focusing on your goals enables you to find your way when you feel overwhelmed. Sharing a burden makes it lighter to bear."

3.20
"You prefer having your day mapped out in detail, but your current schedule won't likely withstand the shifting pressures. Unfortunately, even your most sensible plans will be turned upside down today because the Pisces Solar Eclipse rocks your 3rd House of Immediate Environment. Crossed messages may contribute to delays or even a cancellation of a scheduled event, prompting you to think deeply about how you spend your leisure time. Rolling with the unexpected waves of change allows you to turn any setback into an exciting opportunity."

I will now be drawing myself into all of my favorite series as my favorite character(s.) You're going to have to deal with this so you might as well enjoy it.

"The Way of the Samurai is, morning after morning, the practice of death, considering whether it will be here or be there, imagining the most sightly way of dying, and putting one’s mind firmly in death. Although this may be a most difficult thing, if one will do it, it can be done. There is nothing that one should suppose cannot be done."

"Almost all animals who survive external hazards to their biological functioning eventually die from biological aging, known in life sciences as “senescence”. Some organisms experience negligible senescence, even exhibiting biological immortality. These include the jellyfish Turritopsis dohrnii, the hydra, and the planarian."

"As scientific knowledge and medicine advance, a precise medical definition of death becomes more problematic."

"The concept of death is a key to human understanding of the phenomenon. There are many scientific approaches to the concept. For example, brain death, as practiced in medical science, defines death as a point in time at which brain activity ceases. One of the challenges in defining death is in distinguishing it from life. As a point in time, death would seem to refer to the moment at which life ends. However, determining when death has occurred requires drawing precise conceptual boundaries between life and death. This is problematic because there is little consensus over how to define life. This general problem applies to the particular challenge of defining death in the context of medicine. It is possible to define life in terms of consciousness. When consciousness ceases, a living organism can be said to have died. One of the notable flaws in this approach, however, is that there are many organisms which are alive but probably not conscious (for example, single-celled organisms). Another problem is in defining consciousness, which has many different definitions given by modern scientists, psychologists and philosophers. Additionally, many religious traditions, including Abrahamic and Dharmic traditions, hold that death does not (or may not) entail the end of consciousness. In certain cultures, death is more of a process than a single event. It implies a slow shift from one spiritual state to another.

Other definitions for death focus on the character of cessation of something. In this context "death" describes merely the state where something has ceased, for example, life. Thus, the definition of "life" simultaneously defines death. Historically, attempts to define the exact moment of a human's death have been problematic. Death was once defined as the cessation of heartbeat (cardiac arrest) and of breathing, but the development of CPR and prompt defibrillation have rendered that definition inadequate because breathing and heartbeat can sometimes be restarted. Events which were causally linked to death in the past no longer kill in all circumstances; without a functioning heart or lungs, life can sometimes be sustained with a combination of life support devices, organ transplants and artificial pacemakers. Today, where a definition of the moment of death is required, doctors and coroners usually turn to "brain death" or "biological death" to define a person as being dead; people are considered dead when the electrical activity in their brain ceases. It is presumed that an end of electrical activity indicates the end of consciousness. However, suspension of consciousness must be permanent, and not transient, as occurs during certain sleep stages, and especially a coma. In the case of sleep, EEGs can easily tell the difference. However, the category of "brain death" is seen by some scholars to be problematic. For instance, Dr. Franklin Miller, senior faculty member at the Department of Bioethics, National Institutes of Health, notes: "By the late 1990s, however, the equation of brain death with death of the human being was increasingly challenged by scholars, based on evidence regarding the array of biological functioning displayed by patients correctly diagnosed as having this condition who were maintained on mechanical ventilation for substantial periods of time. These patients maintained the ability to sustain circulation and respiration, control temperature, excrete wastes, heal wounds, fight infections and, most dramatically, to gestate fetuses (in the case of pregnant "brain-dead" women)." Those people maintaining that only the neo-cortex of the brain is necessary for consciousness sometimes argue that only electrical activity should be considered when defining death. Eventually it is possible that the criterion for death will be the permanent and irreversible loss of cognitive function, as evidenced by the death of the cerebral cortex. All hope of recovering human thought and personality is then gone given current and foreseeable medical technology. However, at present, in most places the more conservative definition of death – irreversible cessation of electrical activity in the whole brain, as opposed to just in the neo-cortex – has been adopted (for example the Uniform Determination Of Death Act in the United States). In 2005, the Terri Schiavo case brought the question of brain death and artificial sustenance to the front of American politics. Even by whole-brain criteria, the determination of brain death can be complicated. EEGs can detect spurious electrical impulses, while certain drugs, hypoglycemia, hypoxia, or hypothermia can suppress or even stop brain activity on a temporary basis. Because of this, hospitals have protocols for determining brain death involving EEGs at widely separated intervals under defined conditions."

"People found unconscious under icy water may survive if their faces are kept continuously cold until they arrive at an emergency room. This "diving response", in which metabolic activity and oxygen requirements are minimal, is something humans share with cetaceans called the mammalian diving reflex."

crazypersonthought: we have to return to the oceans....

The True Age Of Aquarius: The Return To Atlantis

Where are the most water-adapted humans on the planet, today?

[Mammalian Diving Reflex]

Aqua Sapiens sapiens

"Bradycardia is the first response to submersion. Immediately upon facial contact with cold water, the human heart rate slows down ten to twenty-five percent. Seals experience changes that are even more dramatic, going from about 125 beats per minute to as low as 10 on an extended dive. Slowing the heart rate lessens the need for bloodstream oxygen, leaving more to be used by other organs. Last is the blood shift that occurs only during very deep dives. When this happens, organ and circulatory walls allow plasma/water to pass freely throughout the thoracic cavity, so its pressure stays constant and the organs aren't crushed. In this stage, the lungs' alveoli fill up with blood plasma, which is reabsorbed when the animal leaves the pressurized environment. This stage of the diving reflex has been observed in humans (such as accomplished freediver Bret Gilliam) during deep (over 90 metres or 300 ft) dives."

[Underwater Vision] -- Seeing underwater... FUN FACT: without my glasses or contacts, and with only goggles, I have perfect 20/20 under water. Beyond 20/20, actually, it's more akin to the movie 'Senseless.' I can see every pore and goose-pimple on someone an Olympic length away.

Accidentally on purpose.
On purpose, accidentally.

3.20.15 -- Happy Birthday, Mr. Rogers! -- Fred Rogers would have turned 87 years old today. -- Fred McFeely Rogers (March 20, 1928 – February 27, 2003) 

Mister Vish's Neighborhood?

Mr. Vish's 'Hood?

How to impact/influence/educate/entertain children whilst doing the same with teenagers/young adults?

How do you account for sexuality, entheogens and intoxicants, violence, the concept of death?

Mr. V
Mister V

Mischievous Mystery

"Rogers was red–green color blind, swam every morning, and neither smoked nor drank."

*ahem* Vish! 

"In 1963, Rogers moved to Toronto, where he was contracted by the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation (CBC) to develop his debut in front of the camera, the 15-minute children's program Misterogers, which though popular with children ran just three seasons."

*AH-AH-AH-AHEM* VISH!!! 

"Rogers also believed in not acting out a different persona on camera compared to how he acted off camera, stating that "One of the greatest gifts you can give anybody is the gift of your honest self. I also believe that kids can spot a phony a mile away.""

"All of us have special ones who have loved us into being. Would you just take, along with me, ten seconds to think of the people who have helped you become who you are. Ten seconds of silence."

X-Rated Mister Rogers
Rated V for Vish

"On New Year's Day 2004, Michael Keaton, who had been a stagehand on Mister Rogers' Neighborhood before becoming an actor, hosted the PBS TV special Fred Rogers: America's Favorite Neighbor."

Searchable shows. sometimes streaming

mister vish neighborhood
mister v talk

mister vish on record
mr v on record
mr v and you

vish us

here&now

MAKE FEEDING YOURSELF AND OTHERS, FUN. 

MAKE FEEDING YOURSELF AND OTHERS SYNONYMOUS WITH FUN. 

THE FUNNEST ASSEMBLY LINE EVER CONCEIVED.

Food Dance.

"Mindfulness is a popular buzzword that most of us associate with meditation, yoga and spirituality, although its definition in popular culture can be loose and subjective. In experimental psychology, the word is more rigorously defined as controlled attentiveness, a deliberate “awareness of what is happening in the present moment.”"

"Mindfulness “facilitates the acceptance of things as they occur.”"

"Good health is simply the slowest way a human being can die."


Memento Mori 

"1. Everyone must die...

2. The remainder of our life span is decreasing continually.

3. Death will come regardless of whether or not we have made time to practice the dharma.

4. Human life expectancy is uncertain.

5. There are many causes of death.

6. The human Body is very fragile.

7. Our wealth cannot help us.

8. Our loved ones cannot help.

9. Our body cannot help."

"Light Grey"
Lawful Neutral + Chaotic Good

"greydient"

Watch/listen to the entire thing entirely in its entirety or do us a both a favor and refrain from speaking to me forever.

"I and The Father are One. He who has seen me has seen The Father. Before Abraham was, I am. I am The Way and The Truth and The Life. I am The Resurrection and The Light." - [You Are, Too.]

"Wake Up EveryBody, and Find Out Who You Are."

"-A- Son Of God." - "Of The Nature Of God." -- We Are All Divine. EveryThing Is Divine.

"What happened was, this being blasphemy for the Jews, it became blasphemy for the Christians for anyone else [other] than Jesus to say it. They said 'Okay, baby, it was so with you, but there it stops! No more of this business!' And as a result of that, Jesus was made irrelevant by Pedastalization, by Being Kicked Up-Stairs. In spite of the fact that He said, "Greater works than these, that I do, shall you do." 'Oh no, upstairs with you, baby. Because we just can't have that sorta thing going on in a Monarchical Universe. We're not gonna have democracy in the Kingdom Of Heaven.'"

"Be not anxious for the morrow."

"Do not worry about what you shall eat and what you shall drink and what you shall wear, God'll take care of you. Doesn't He take care of the birds? Don't the flowers grow? They're wonderful, they're crazy, they're great! What are you worrying about?!"

"the only serious philosophical problem is whether or not to commit suicide"

"Yes, Boredom is of course -The- Problem."
"Boredom is the Other Side of Creativity. And the energy of Creation, that is the Yang, the Yin side of that energy is called Boredom. Everything is of course fundamentally Yang and Yin, if you understand that, you really don't need to understand anything else."

-- --The- Authority.-

3.21.15 -- "You're less interested in gaining recognition for your efforts today than you are in developing your potential. There is a deeper message that taskmaster Saturn is teaching you now and it's not about being admired or appreciated. In fact, you might be disappointed at first if your well-intended actions go unnoticed. Continue to do the best you can in all endeavors. Seeing your game improve is more rewarding now than anything else."

Please permit me an indefinite amount of time to sit still, breathe, and be quiet.

"Oh Buddhas and Bodhisattvas abiding in all directions,
Endowed with great compassion,
Endowed with foreknowledge,
Endowed with divine eye,
Endowed with love,
Affording protection to sentient beings,
Please come forth through the power of your great compassion,
Please accept these offerings, both actually presented and mentally created.

Oh Compassionate Ones, you who possess
The wisdom of understanding,
The love of compassion,
The power of doing divine deeds,
And of protecting in incomprehensible measure,
[...................................] is passing from this world to the next,
[He/she] is taking a great leap,
The light of this world has faded for [him/her],
[He/she] has entered solitude with their karmic forces,
[He/she] has gone into a vast silence,
[He/she] is borne away by the great ocean of birth and death ..…

Oh Compassionate Ones, protect [......................] who is defenceless. Be to [him/her] like a mother and father.

Oh Compassionate Ones, let not the force of your compassion be weak, but aid them.

Let [...........................] not go into the miserable states of existence.

Forget not your ancient vows."

I wish Abbey would get home already...

X & Y

X and Y.

X vs. Y

Two symbols typically used to represent something unspecified but understood not to be something else, usually used in mathematics. Our culture uses them to represent two other opposing forces as well. Male and Female. An apt representation, I'd say. At first glance, what jumps out at you about these two letters? If you didn't know which represented which, how would you assign genders to these letters? To me, it's immediately obvious. X is female and Y is male.

I mean just look at them.

X (open legs) Welcoming you in, splitting two decisions down the middle and alleging with neither.

Y (phallic) Plunging forward. Ahead. Taking two scenarios and whittling away one to pursue the other.

[Stereotypically] How we do define women? Emotional, unreasonable, indecisive. Every woman you have ever known has dragged you through a department store unable to choose between this and that. Most women I know do the same thing romantically. They date a man, while pursuing other interests and then leap-frog from one to the other until they find the best match. The grass is always greener.

Men, on the other hand? How do we "shop"? Normally a male knows what he wants before he even begins making moves toward it. We go to the store with one item in mind, acquire it (or a pre-calculated back-up if it is unavailable) and roll. Quick, clean, precise.

Now granted I know that not ALL women fit into the category outlined above and nor do ALL men fit the criteria listed either, but for the sake of argument allow me to cleanly split the two to identify their opposing forces.

This all goes back to my realization that every occupation a person can hold can be distilled down to one thing: decision-making. We pay people to make our decisions for us. Personal Trainers, Chefs, Film Directors, etc. When we give them our money, we are in essence saying, "Here, these options overwhelm me, make my choice for me."

So now, unfortunately with the seemingly negative connotation of suggesting that women or the female half is "wrong" or "evil", I proffer the following: X = the inability to choose and the subsequent downfall of "the system", while Y = the ability to weigh two options, decide on one and stay the course. Y, commitment. X, undecided.

Embark on a thought experiment with me, if you will. Picture an x as it is and then continue the legs for as long as you can. They will never cross paths, and as the distance between them grows, their overall length dwindles. Taken another way, if one were to fractal with the shape of an x, eventually everything would start running into each other and the whole thing would come crashing down.

Y, has one direction. Its line continued forward goes on for infinity. Fractal it, and you have a "tree". Growth. Sustainable growth than can be traced back to a single root.

I used to be known for my decisiveness. Next to my confidence it was one of my most prominent character traits. It defined who I was. While to the outside, that may have still seemed the case, to a select few and myself it was apparent that a few years back I became more X than Y.

Spoiled for choice.

I can trace this time back to when everything in my life started to go wrong. When I lost who I was and what I was doing and what I wanted to do with my life.

Recently I have reclaimed my Y. Self-actualized my Y chromosome.

When LOST first debuted, I identified the most with Jack. Despite holding Locke in high regard. While I see my overall character as more akin to Locke than Jack, I more relate to the circumstances Jack was thrown into when the plane first hit the island. The people chose him as a leader and then ridiculed his decisions. Choosing a leader is a scapegoat. A win/win. If he fucks up, you disagree with him, if he does well, you assert that you were integral in choosing him. I have dealt with this on some scale or another for my entire life.

Take the simple act of going out to eat. You've got four people in a car all going "I dunno, where do you wanna go?" Until someone picks (typically the most decisive member available) a person to choose. That person usually being me it goes something like this,

Person A
"Where do you wanna go?"

Person B
"I dunno, where do you wanna go?"

Person C
*shrugs*

Person A
"Let's ask Josh. Make him choose. Josh, where should we go?"

Josh
"We should go to X."

Person B
"I just went to X, how about Y?"

Person C
"Y is gross and X is lame, why not Z?"

Person A
"Z? haven't been to Z in a while..."

A, B and C in unison:
"Z it is!"

Josh
"WTF?!"

Why even bother asking me if you're just going to turn down my decision?! Because they needed a force to oppose. They couldn't/can't think of anything on their own, so they look to me to draw a line in the sand and then they use that merely as a reference point. To make choices relative to. Not the actual choice.

This conflict can happen inside one's head, and often does. Mine for sure.

I'm done with worrying about what I will miss out on, because doing that isn't getting me anything anyway. If someone puts a serving of pizza and a serving of chinese before you and tells you that you can only have one, you have to make a choice. It's one or the other. Not both. Can't make a choice? Then you go hungry. Sure I may be missing out on chinese, but fuck me running this pizza is delicious...

Have you ever noticed how easy it is to counsel someone's life from the outside? The whole time you are thinking, "Man, I'm like Dr. Phil, I should have my own show...." But your life is a wreck. Why is that? Why is it easier to make others decisions for them versus making your own for yourself? Because when it's for an outsider, you exonerate them of responsibility. They get all of the glory with no possible defeat. Disagree with your decision, and go their own route? They become independent, self-motivated. "I didn't need his stupid advice." *applause* Listen to what you have to say and take it to heart? "I'm so glad I made the decision to go to him in the first place." "Good for you for going, I'm proud." It's safe. Guaranteed.

In your own head however, it's a solo sport. A one man team. You either get all the glory or receive all the defeat. You succeed? You move forward. You revel in your self-reliance. You fuck up? You have no one to blame but yourself.

This used to be a negative for me, but then I realized that it wasn't always that way. I chose the sports reference purposefully. As a kid I hated team sports specifically for those reasons. You win? You do well? It was the team that did well. They chose you. They trained you. They passed you the ball before you put it in the goal. Shared glory. Not my thing. But if you botch that game-winning shot? The loss is all yours. "Thanks, Josh." "Way to go, retard." Win as a team, lose as an individual.

That's what drew me to bodybuilding and martial arts and strongman. Solo. No one to defer glory or defeat to. You shoulder it all yourself. And you know what? I'd rather have it that way. You do you, Umma do me.

People chastise men like James Cameron for being an asshole. But then they thankfully sit down and watch his movies as they makes millions. Do you think Jim is sitting at home losing sleep over some PA's feelings he hurt? Fuck no, he's swimming in his millions and making Avatar 2. He's a decision-maker. A man. Negative portrayals paint him as "self-important" or "egotistical". Fuck that. He is driven and he knows what he wants. If he didn't, his movies would never get made and they wouldn't have made the absurd amount of money that they have. Success requires a certain amount of ego. I used to instinctively understand this.

It's time to get back to my roots.

I've been SUPER-depressed lately, the worst I've ever been. I've almost made it of the hole I'm in but there is still a long way to go. My life is on the edge. Thin ice. Any moment now it could all come crashing down. I mean real shit too. Not teenage emo drama bullshit, I mean like homelessness, possible legal repercussions. REAL SHIT.

On one hand I've never been more focused and driven in my entire life. I've been writing and I'm making real tangible moves toward getting my life back, but on the other I am so ready to throw in the towel. After being told I'd received "time served" meaning that my time spent in jail and on house arrest exonerated me from future fines or probation I somehow apparently owe $500+ in court costs. Money I don't even begin to MAYBE have. To compound that glorious news I have to be out of my current place by the 22nd. Less than two weeks. And I have positively nothing lined up.

X vs. Y

Or,

Two road diverge in a yellow wood...

I've been in PA on my own (more or less) for a few years now, and before I lost my way, the goal was to eventually be a rich and famous filmmaker. An enterprise. A tour-de-force. A household name. A VERB. Writer/Director/Editor/Actor. And more. Simultaneous to those titles I would be a Comedian and Martial Artist and most importantly Father. Josh Vish. Those goals seem so far away now... But at least I've re-realized them. I used to live in LA for obvious reasons and had entertained moving back until the writing bug bit me.

I'm getting older and my looks are fading, I can't (and no longer) expect to be a break-out movie star at 25. I'm not getting down on myself or saying it's an impossibility, I'm just saying that it doesn't look likely. It's a shallow business and appearance matters. What I can do is: write and direct movies and put myself in them. And largely that's what I intend to do. Not because of any ego or thinking that I "deserve to be seen" but because I like acting. It's fun for me, I enjoy the process. And that'll be one less paycheck I have to sign. ;)

So I stayed in Pittsburgh, intent to focus on my writing. But like any good writer, I slacked off. Got distracted. Invested in too many projects at once. And, eventually, lost my way. Along with my ultimate goal. I forgot why I wanted to do such things with my life. I couldn't answer why live life at all. (Honestly something I sill struggle with, but the short answer is: because I want to.) In my defense I've dealt with more bullshit in the past 3 years than most human beings, Americans deal with in their entire lives. Loss of license, job, shelter, girlfriend, spending time in jail and on house arrest. I've had a lot dividing my time away from writing and my long-term goals. And rightfully so. I need to focus on supporting myself in a real-world environment before I can devote myself to my craft again.

And I am trying.

God it feels good to say that.

I am trying.

I have a job interview today and plan to resume my community service tomorrow. Awesome. However, I still don't know where I am going to be living in 2 weeks, and that's where all this X and Y symbolism comes into play. Decisions need to be made. Courses need to be set. Roads need to be paved.

My options (whether realistic or not) are as follows (and neatly divided into categories of Fight vs. Flight):
Flight:
Leave Pittsburgh and or PA in general. Either to New Mexico (where my parents are), Japan (where my heart is) or France (where my lifestyle is). Perhaps even the UK (where a good portion of my mind resides)
Fight:
Find another place in Cory, secure the job I'm interviewing for today (or another one), finish my community service and then move to one of the places listed above.

Flight really isn't an option. Legally I am backed into a corner. The Man (think the law personified as Jason Voorhees, or Michael Myers) is looming over me, and while I could probably squeeze under his legs and run into the woods, he'd eventually get me. He always does. He will inevitably catch up to whomever he is chasing. So my only real option is fight. Here. Now. And with what I have. Sure he is big and carrying a weapon, but creatures do amazing thing when they are forced to. I'm a somewhat larger fellow myself, and mildly aware of some martial arts... perhaps I will wait for him to strike, block the blow, hip-toss him and then dismember him with his own weapon. Or my bare-hands if needed. In non-symbolic terms that translates to:

I can't leave here (here being the Pittsburgh area) until I have paid of the inexplicable $500 I owe and completed the remaining 152 hours of community service I still am court-ordered to do. Seemingly simple tasks, but being licenseless and about to be homeless complicates matters. Greatly.

My ideal itinerary would look like this:
I stay here until I have completed the above requirements and regained my license. And ideally that whole time I'd simultaneously be getting back in shape at the gym job I hopefully secure today. After that I would bounce. I get my license back in August and feel I owe Pittsburgh one last chance at providing me with a nice summer. Instead of one in a cast, or jail. After that, with my ultimate goal of becoming a rich and famous filmmaker father I'd very likely head out west. Probably first to New Mexico. I've researched it a fair bit and in addition to reuniting with my parents (which I love and miss very much) I'd be afforded a great many deal of opportunities. The greatest of which being free school. My parents have offered to put me through school. Wow. Talk about second chances. When you're 19 (and cocky, not just for that age but as an inherent character trait) and interested in creative careers, school seems fruitless. [19 year old Josh]: "The only reason I'd ever go to school for movies, is to network. Other than that, it's pointless. I don't want them ruining my creativity with their retarded rules and guidelines."

While a good portion of me still feels that way, the older and wiser part knows better. School will only destroy my creativity or put it in a box if I let it. And then of course there's that glorious networking, being surrounded by individuals who share my passion. Sure to be inspiring. It always was in the gym. And other people's workouts never seemed to affect my own, or my progress. So why should their schoolwork affect mine? It shan't and won't. Unless I let it. There are people in the world right now who would very likely kill to be in my shoes. Now and meaning with this opportunity. Free school? Only a retard would turn it down. Besides, in addition to cinema, I'd be able to pursue other avenues of my interest as well. Like Japan. Or psychology. Or botany. With school the options are endless. So I'd very much like to go, majoring in Cinema, while learning the Japanese language and as much about their culture and history in a school environment as I can.  After that, I become a global force in media and move to Japan. Not necessarily in that order. Shortly after traveling the globe and seeing my share of sights and interacting with my share of cultures and people I'll decide on a place to live and raise a family. All while comfortably still dominating the movie world. That is the goal that is going to lay my path out for me.

This job I'm going to be interviewing for today is by no means a dream job, but on many levels it is. It is near perfect for where I am in my life right now. And considering my goals. Fitness used to be HUGE part of my life and I'm trying to make it that way again. While I no longer want to personally train people, I still do want to be in peak physical condition. I also plan on owning a gym (or 37) "when I grow up". Just one part of the Vish Empire I plan to create after the millions from my films start rolling in. Not only do I miss being in a gym simply for the effect it has on my body, but also for the one it has on my mind. I miss the symbolism of working out just as much (if not more) than the actual physical process. That's another thing, I don't just enjoy the results, I enjoy the process. Being built is a side-effect of doing something I enjoy, something that makes me feel good. Filmmaking should likely end up being the same way. I miss having physical tangible results day in day out mirroring the effort I put in. Learning to push myself in the gym spilled out into the real world. Goals in life are just the same as goals in the weight room. You define one and then work toward it. And progressive-resistance training is a great symbol for how to achieve in general. You take where you are now, measure it against where you want to be and then take systematic steps toward it. I miss that. I miss watching the numbers increase on the tape measurer, the scale and in my books. My books being where I logged how much I lifted and how many times. There's few feelings in life as great as going all out one day, recording the result and then coming back the next week and pushing beyond it. You feel invincible. Unstoppable. I used to feel that way about everything, not just working out. It's time to regain that. The position I've applied for and am interviewing today is that of Front Desk. Face-Man. The Face of YMCA. I can do that. I can more than do that. I'm a born and bred social creature. Very easy to approach. Very welcoming, very familiar. In most any walk of life you can imagine, people gravitate toward me. Especially in a gym environment. I've had a very similar job before and despite the douchebag management it was one of my favorite jobs I've ever held. A fact I only realized in retrospect, unfortunately. Hindsight being 20/20 and all that. My main duty would be interacting with people. Perfect. In addition to that I'd be afforded a free membership. Something I have been dying for even since before I broke my wrist two years back. The portion of their set-up that I would actually utilize is meager, but it would get the job done. The basics are all there. And besides it's best not to go too crazy right out the gate. After about 5 years of no longer maintaining a regular work-out routine, and this past year of living the absolute definition of a sedentary lifestyle, easing back into the water will likely be for the best.

That's a lot of birds being murdered with not a lot of stones being thrown. Money to support myself. Check. Money to put toward my fines (or court costs or whatever the fuck they are). Check. Gym membership to get my body, mind and soul back in solid health. Check. The only downsides are that it's part-time and downtown. Quite a commute for one without a car. Heck it'd be one even if I did have a car. But I'm not gonna let that stop me. A part time job is better than nothing right now and it being downtown affords me an excuse to walk (lending to my fitness again) and see the sights of the city. And to be exposed to its people. Here's hoping I get it. :D After a few chores around the house here and getting myself ready (hygienically as well as mentally) I'll take the bus down and put my best foot forward. And even if I don't get it, at least I can say I did that.

This Y is forging ahead.

Tertium Quid

Tertium Quid -

1. Something that cannot be classified into either of two groups considered exhaustive; an intermediate thing or factor.

2. A third person or thing of indeterminate character.